Gilligan's Island PT One

This is the tale of Gilligan Island, by FASTJ

"Ho land, ho land!" Gilligan spurted out, from his precarious perch atop the stick above the sail.
"Gilligan, that is not the way you say it!" Skipper yelled above the raging wind and rain, "You're supposed to say, Land ho, land ho!"

"Sorry Skip!" Gilligan hollered.
"Don't worry about it!"
"TY!"
"Don't throw text at me!"
"K!"
"Stop it!"
"?4U"
"What!"
"Y?!"
"Because I will throw you overboard!"
"Y?!..."
And so the conversation went, as the boat drifted closer and closer to the rocky shore.
"Shush your tongue or I will do it 4 you!"
"Uh Skipper-"
"-Yes I know I said 4 instead of for…That just means your non-"

"SKIPPER!" Gilligan yelled out, Interrupting his sentence. In fact it was so loud a yell even the crashing waves (yes, the boat was now so close to the rocky shore you could hear the waves crash) and the raging wind and rain were drowned out.

The Skipper turned around to see what the noise was about.
"Gilig-emph, y did-emph, u tell-emph, me?!" Skipper spluttered out, being covered in spray as he said it.
"I-emph, tri-" Next thing Gilligan knew, it was pitch black.